The Palestine Herald, Palestine, Texas

January 3, 2014

THE EAST TEXAN ADVICE COLUMN: Tantrumonial outburst

Palestine Herald-Press

PALESTINE — Editor's Note: The East Texan is a light-hearted advice column written with colloquial savoir faire. Need advice on life in our neck of the woods? Email

Right in the middle of a Christmas shopping trip my three-year-old lay down on the floor of my favorite department store recently and began throwing a tantrum. I was so embarrassed I just picked him up and left the store which put me behind in my Christmas shopping.

If he throws a tantrum again in a public place, how should I handle the situation?

The next time your little elf decides he wants his name added to Santa’s naughty list, paddling his precious posterior until his little derriere cheeks resemble those rosy red ones of Ol’ Saint Nick will accelerate his developing a positive attitude.

When you left the department store during the first tantrumonial outburst, you gave your dramatic little grinch exactly what he wanted. What he needed, however, was a swift reminder who is in charge.

And, if store patrons cry “child abuse,” I’ll lead a brigade of Bible bearing behavior modification specialists and quote rod and child rearing scripture to them until you’ve had time to buy everything on your Christmas list.

Let me leave you with two important points. One, your child is not in charge and, two, Christ is the reason for the season.