The Palestine Herald, Palestine, Texas

Opinion

February 2, 2013

LIFE BEHIND THE PINE CURTAIN: Two East Texas Stories

EDITOR’S NOTE:  Life Behind the Pine Curtain  is a series of anecdotes collected and edited by Herald-Press Publisher Gary Connor.

  Fishing

A retired Palestine man went fishing one morning, but after a short time he ran out of bait.

Then, out of the corner of his eye, he saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth. "Frogs are good bass bait," he thought to himself.

   Knowing the snake couldn't bite him with the frog in his mouth, he grabbed the snake right behind the head, took the frog, and put it in his bait bucket.

   Just then, he realized he had a problem: How was he going to release the snake

without getting bit?

   So, he grabbed his bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in the snake’s mouth.

   The snake's eyes rolled back and he went limp. He released him into the lake without incident and carried on fishing using the frog.

   A little later, the fisherman felt a nudge at his foot. There was that same snake with two more frogs in its mouth.

   Life is good in East Texas.

  Texting

   An East Texas house wife texted her husband at work on a cold February morning: "Windows frozen."

   The husband texted back: "Pour some lukewarm water over it."

   The wife texted back 5 minutes later: "Computer completely messed up now."

 

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